Sparkles the Wonder Computer

Sparkles runs on the famous Macrohard Angst operating system. It never crashes, except when something goes wrong.
Tech support is located in the Andromeda galaxy.

Vlod Ironbeak's computer terminal is an old pipe organ salvaged from a bankrupt goth rock band. Many people write programs for Angst using old Caledonian, which the Scots developed during the Middle Ages to control their Mars shuttle, the Bonnie Haggis.

If you don't like messing around with computers, you can try one of these gift baskets filled with useful chocolate. I've heard it said that you can use almost any kind of numbering system to write a computer program, so why not use chocolate? If the program doesn't work, you can just eat it, and start again with a fresh batch of chocolate.

And now, back to work.

I put my huge, larger-than-life plastic model of a crow in my office. It startles my wife every time she sees it, until she remembers it's just a harmless plastic model.

heh heh heh....

Caw!