The Witch of Nines

The poet, Rimbaud, said that to each person, several other lives are due.
Cats have nine lives, and they don't even write poetry.

I haven't had chocolate cake in awhile--that's a gap that should be filled soon, or the world will come to an end. Here's a chocolate cake with rasberries from the Heart and Stroke Foundation that won't wreck your arteries. Health is good for you, in moderation.

Here's something that looks interesting--chocolate cake balls from the Sphere-Licious Company. These feature home-made cake and home-made icing dipped in chocolate. This could be the start of a beautiful friendship.

Here are some great photographs of demolition equipment hard at work from Delsan Aim, an environmental services company. You'll see big excavators chewing up steel girders as if they were noodles.

Once again, chocolate and demolition. What coud be finer?

No worries.

A Wizard's Jealousy

There's no Statute of Limitations on jealousy.

The weather pundits say the temperature is -26 C here, if you factor in the wind-chill element. At these temperatures, my brain freezes.

This calls for hot chocolate, or perhaps even three cups. If you have a real craving for it, you might try the Italian cioccolata densa, which, according to Wikipedia, is a very thick version of hot chocolate.

Where were we? Ah yes--busy constructing a new house. To this end, we have assembled a portfolio of equipment, including lumber trucks, concrete trucks, and an excavator.

But now, while still gluing pieces of wood together, or hammering nails into them, it's time to think about matters electrical. Will we have enough juice for all of our devices? And what sort of a backup system should we install, in case the world ends and there's a power failure?

There are several approaches here, depending on the size of your back yard. You could install a nuclear reactor, or a liquefied natural gas plant and generator, or a windmill farm, or a large array of solar panels.

Unfortunately, I don't believe Ikea sells kits for nuclear reactors or liquefied natural gas plants, so you wouldn't be able to assemble one of these babies with just a Turner wrench and a set of instructions.

You could always make do with a hundred or so smaller, gas-fired generators tastefully arranged in artistic patterns on your lawn, but filling their tanks would be tedious.

My suggestion is to equip yourself with a diesel locomotive. Here are some nice ones from Electro-Motive Diesel, Inc., which should supply enough electrical power in an emergency to keep an entire server farm going.

If shopping for house-building supplies is getting you down, take a break and feast your eyes on these demolition attachments from Bodine Mfg. for awhile.

So there you have it.

No worries.

We Have a Problem

Some people enjoy being angry.

Not me.

Valentine's Day is rapidly approaching. If you plan on giving the perfect gift, you might want to shop early for chocolates--that way you can test out chocolate assortments from several manufacturers before making your selection. It's tough work, I know, but here, from Nielsen, is an example to get you started on your arduous, chocolate-tasting task.

Yesterday, we discussed the first step in building your house, which is purchasing an excavator and constructing a hole into which you can fit your domain. Planning, of course, is important, but some people prefer to plan their house after they've built it.

Excavators get lonely all by themselves, so you might want to think about adding some machinery to keep your new pet company. A pile driver would be a good investment, especially if you've decided to build your house in your neighbor's yard, or in a swamp.

Here's a nice pile driver from Hammer & Steel.

You can also use your new pile driver to teach your computer a lesson when it misbehaves. Simply place your naughty computer directly beneath the hammer, climb into the cab, and let the hammer drop. Your computer won't give you any more trouble.

By the way, if you decide to build your house in your neighbor's yard, you'll be forced to do a bit of demolition work, so don't sell off the shears and crushers you got for Christmas.

I'll bet you never realized building a house could be so much fun!

No worries.

OddVlod Coolbeak, Mayor of Toronto

The beat generation goes in and out of fashion, but their jargon lingers on, because it's rooted in jazz, and jazz is a fixed and beckoning star in a murky firmament.

Ha! Fine words for a Monday morning.

I've been reading old 'Archie' comics, where you can find a complete alternate universe, as friendly and safe as many of the early Disney universes. A little unreality is an effective antidote to the heavy concepts that people often bash you with--duty, responsibility, earnest endeavor etc.

If you'd like to purchase some heavy duty mining equipment this morning, here is a nice bucket wheel excavator (batteries not included).

And here are lots of chocolate chip cookies from laaloosh.com.

Time out....

Eat your broccoli!